Redefining Beauty - Outcomes Beyond Measure

Tuesday I shared about the "Redefining Beauty" Girls Inc. program, which I recently facilitated at a local elementary school. The girls participating in the program came from diverse socioeconomic backgrounds. I could not say that conflict did not happen (after all, I was working with 9 to 11 year-old girls)! However, the positive outcomes of the program were phenomenal.

My co-facilitator and I made great progress with the girls. With the support of Girls Inc. and school staff, we built trust, and saw girls open up around the activities and topics. We challenged their understanding of beauty, and took advantage of many teachable moments.


The last session, the girls were charged with performing one to two minute commercials about themselves, sharing "What makes me beautiful?", "What makes me unique?" and other things they wanted to tell their peers. The girls had the previous session to plan, write and practice their commercials. I was so impressed with how focused the girls were during this exercise. They took the challenge seriously, and they really wanted to share about themselves to peers and trusted adults!


Some of my favorite moments from the program were:

• One girl came to us defensive and highly confrontational. When presenting her commercial, she acknowledged that people do not get to know her, and she suggested this might be different if she changed her tone of voice and behavior. This was great progress! She acknowledged a challenge she faced, the girls saw her own up to it, and the group validated her for sharing her feelings and reinforced the beautiful and unique person she is.
• Another girl was considerate and shy. When it came to writing her commercial, she shared about a (non-contagious) disease she had. While in some settings, she might have wanted to hide it, in Girls Inc. we had an accepting environment where she felt comfortable owning her disease and sharing about it with her peers.
• During one session, we had a discussion about how to respond to someone who criticizes outward appearances. The girls had wonderful, thoughtful ideas, such as: "Say something nice about her in return." "Ignore the comment." "Think about something you do well (inner beauty) and share why you are proud of it."
  

As you can see, the girls were truly remarkable, and the "Redefining Beauty" curriculum helped affirm their self-confidence and enabled them to validate real beauty in themselves and others. I am so glad I have the opportunity to be a role model for girls, and that Women's Fund supports gender-specific programming like "Redefining Beauty" for girls.

Redefining Beauty

I really enjoy helping people through volunteering. When I had the opportunity to lead Girls Inc. of Greater Indianapolis programs through Junior League, I jumped on it. Not only do I enjoy mentoring children - especially girls, but this was a perfect connection to our mission at Women's Fund.

This was my second time facilitating a Girls Inc. program - last fall, I lead a "Work it Out" program with girls age 6 to 8. This week, I finished up another program, "Redefining Beauty." In one-hour sessions over six weeks, I co-facilitated the program to about ten girls age 9 to 11 (3rd and 4th grade). This program covers a number of important topics, including:

• Defining what is real beauty.
• Looking who shapes our own concept of beauty, and thinking of positive influences, instead of negative ones.
• Beauty stereotypes in magazines - what's real, what's not.
• Creating awareness about eating disorders (the basics).
• Learning that our body is a resource, not an object.
• Specifically identifying "what makes me beautiful and unique", and practicing how to tell others about these qualities.
• Practicing how to recognize and affirm inner beauty in others.

Each session we led discussions and interactive activities with girls around these topics. Girls also had the opportunity to keep a personal journal each time, which they could take home at the end of the program.

Check back on the Women's Fund blog Thursday, when I will share more about my experience, including challenges faced and strides made with the girls.

Dress for Success Highlighted on "National Makeover Day"

Today is "National Makeover Day" on QVC, featuring Dress for Success and the stories of clients, including two local women, Clara and Lynette. Clara (pictured right) was featured this morning; Lynette will be featured tonight at 11 p.m.

Both women's stories are inspiring. Clara, for example, had worked the same job for 22 years and was laid off with one day's notice. She learned that she needed to develop computer skills in order to apply and market herself for new jobs, so she enrolled in computer classes at a community center, which led her to access services with Dress for Success Indianapolis (DFSI) in 2003. Since 2004, she has been employed as a customer service representative and trainer. Clara is an active member of DFSI's Professional Women's Group, helping launch the program in 2006 and currently having a leadership role. Clara has achieved great success—personally, on the job, and at DFSI.

Clara's story illustrates how women progress on their path to self-sufficiency in partnership with DFSI, which has served 5,700 women over ten years—including 1,000 in 2009. The average age of a DFSI client (as of March) is 45.5. 75 percent of women who participated are employed (65 percent full time), and they have an above-average wage of $10 per hour.

DFSI offers three main opportunities for clients:

• A suiting program, pairing clients with a volunteer personal shopper and allows a woman to shop in the boutique (pictured right) for head-to-toe interview attire, including a suit, shoes, hosiery, hair products, makeup, and purse. Women can also obtain a complete work outfit, including business attire and uniforms, such as scrubs, catering uniforms, and work boots.
• The Career Center and computer lab (pictured right), which allows women to develop a resume, learn basic job-seeking tips, and hear from motivational speakers, for example. Women attend meetings and events to help them learn social norms when interacting with others. DFSI often works with other organizations, who recommend clients to the Career Center. Starting in June, they will partner with Training Inc., another Women's Fund grantee, to serve additional clients and provide a tailored program.
• The Professional Women's Group (PWG), which includes opportunities for women to make personal plans, learn skills, and develop a support network (see participants' "Steps to Success" goals, pictured right). Graduates of can become members of a lifelong group. There is also a post-incarceration group, which helps women stay on track, set goals, recognize negative support systems, and have access to advocacy and other resources.

As you can see, Dress for Success Indianapolis does an amazing job helping women on their path to self-sufficiency. Women's Fund is proud to have supported them since their inception, including seed money to support their start in 1999. DFSI has grown in earnest since then, and has impacted countless inspirational clients, such as Clara, who are now living independently in our community.

Sniffles and summer vacation mean extra planning for moms

Today I was struck by my good fortune of having a strong network – particularly in terms of quality daycare, a good family who helps with the kids and the ability to tap into the great community resources available for working moms. I’m currently facing two situations that are not uncommon to working moms – a sick kid and planning for summer care. Both raise the question of balancing work and family responsibilities.

After shuffling schedules, cancelling a few meetings and attempting to get some work done (this blog being the last thing I will do before conceding to the sniffles and playing nurse to my sick one), I’ve successfully handled the first issue.

The second issue, however, takes a little more planning. While summer vacation is great for the kids, it’s often hard on working parents. Fortunately, there are a lot of great resources offered in Indianapolis – not surprising to know that several of them are supported by Women’s Fund of Central Indiana.

• Summer Camps: Women’s Fund has provided scholarships and operating support to Girl Scouts of Central Indiana, Girls Inc. of Greater Indianapolis, Girls Inc. of Franklin/Johnson Co. and Girls Inc. of Shelbyville – all with the goal of providing safe, fun and affordable summer activities for girls.
• Day Care: Day Nursery Association of Indianapolis has been awarded several grants from Women’s Fund to help with its tuition assistance program, helping families afford excellent early care and education for young children.
• Community Centers: Concord Neighborhood Center, Hawthorne and John H. Boner Community Centers have all received operational support from Women’s Fund to allow them to continue serving families and individuals in their communities.

While my oldest will be attending various camps this summer (including Girls Inc. and Indy Parks); my youngest will continue to attend his daycare. Both will allow me to continuing working, while knowing they are in a safe place.

Challenging what we know

Today's blog post is contributed by Raquel Richardson, OPTIONS Alumna, Class 6. We thank Raquel for sharing her perspective on a recent OPTIONS Alumnae event, a discussion of the novel Push, by Sapphire, inspiration for recent Academy Award Best Picture nominee, Precious.

By Raquel Richardson

Principal
Silver Square :: Marketing + Design

We know the sun will come up tomorrow. We know the leaves turn colors in the fall. We know the earth is round. We know the truth – until we don’t. Our world has a funny way of keeping us off balance and adding in those little idiosyncrasies that make us pause and take note, challenging what we know.

Then we are exposed to a story like Push, by Sapphire, which later turned into the award-winning movie Precious. Most of us go about our day thinking children are cared for, mother’s take care of their children, teachers hold our kids accountable and on and on. Then we realize, that’s not the truth.

Our latest OPTIONS Alumnae event conversed about the challenges, stereotypes, personal experiences, parenting fears and more in our discussion of this story. Anita Carpenter from the Indiana Coalition Against Sexual Assault joined us to help facilitate the evening, and act as a mentor to us in our ability to find answers we could relate to, and ways in which we can take our talents and steps to ensure fewer and fewer children walk in a life like Precious.

Anita introduced us to a couple new ways to help teach our children to deal with uncomfortable situations:

1. Bystander Intervention. We can teach our children, and practice ourselves, to speak up when we witness others doing something they shouldn’t. Using simple phrases such as "that isn’t appropriate" or "we don’t allow that kind of language in our house" are effective and simple ways we can interrupt a situation;


2. Go tell a Mommy. My childhood advice when I felt like I needed to tell someone of authority something was to go talk to a police officer. That’s not realistic today. When a child is out at a mall, out with their friends or find themselves in a situation where they are lost or scared for any reason, they are told to go tell a Mommy. A Mommy will find an answer and take care of you.

Discussing this story, hearing comments from my peers and learning of the real-life cases Anita has experienced, brought a whole new awareness for me. It’s good to expand your personal comfort zone on topics you would otherwise not bring to your dinner table. Likewise, it’s good to hear how we can help. Thanks to other volunteers at the coalition, you can assist children in schools or on-call in hospitals once properly trained on these topics. If this is a personal cause of passion for you, take advantage of the training and help one child at a time never have to relate to Precious’s story.

Follow Raquel on Twitter @silversquare or join Silver Square's fan page www.facebook.com/graybox.

Challenged to make a difference by a group of kids

Give a few kids a video camera and see how they can inspire others. That’s just what Women’s Fund of Central Indiana did during their GO Family Philanthropy Day. Their creativity, passion and honesty are heartwarming, touching and motivating. They asked simple questions – and answered them with their own ideas of how they could change the world. In just two minutes, they made me think about ways I could make a difference (they also made me smile). Click here to see the video.

I know I’m already making a difference in some of the volunteer work I do throughout the community, but what can I do to do more? After watching the video, I realized there are simple things I could do that would make a difference. Serving on the boards of The Leukemia & Lymphoma Society and Lacy Leadership Association, volunteering to serve meals at Wheeler Mission Ministries throughout the year and chairing the Komen Indianapolis Race for the Cure are all important work, but so is giving up something to give to others.

• Their simple ideas of buying less gum and giving away unwanted items to people in need are easy to do, so why not do it?
• Their idea of getting their friends together to start a club sounds fun, so why not get family friends together and start a project?

I’m going to take them up on their challenge. I don’t know how yet, because I want to involve my family. I always ask my kids to dig through their toys before their birthdays and donate unused toys, but is that what they really want to do? Maybe my 7 and 3-year-old have their own ideas of how they want to help others. We’ll soon find out.

I encourage you to take the challenge – and then share with us what you’re doing to make a difference. I’ll plan to report back in a month and share some of the ideas – and actions the Young family is doing. If you feel compelled to share your story, please do. We’d love to know what other Central Indiana families are doing to make a difference in our community.

Shouldn't girls "just wanna have fun" - not worry about losing weight?

Women’s Fund recently posted on an article on Facebook about elementary school girls trying to lose weight. Although the report was from 2003, the fact that 40% of 1-5th grade girls at the time wanted to lose weight is alarming. What’s more alarming is that my daughter, Bailey, will be heading into the 2nd grade (only 19 days as a 1st grader, as she reminded me this morning) – and I’m already seeing and hearing comments from her friends that make me nervous.

• “Do you think I look skinnier than when I was in kindergarten?” – one of her friends asked me when I saw her for the first time in first grade.
• “You really don’t want me to change into shorts because I have big legs.” – one of her friends told me when I took the girls to the gym after school.

The NY Times article was an interesting read. I’ve decided that being aware is better than ignoring the situation. Weight, self-esteem and confidence issues are just a matter of life. All I can do is be a positive, supportive and encouraging role model for my daughter. I want her to have fun – not worry about her weight!

This summer, I signed Bailey up for Girls Inc. 2010 Strong, Smart, Bold, and Inspired Day Camp – an 8-week camp that promises to be “fun and empowering”. Given the information about girls and their weight, I am particularly interested in the how Girls Inc. will help these young girls discover their inner beauty and self-esteem in their Redefining Beauty program. The camp also will focus on sports, arts, culture, science, money management and so much more.

Women’s Fund has long been a supporter of Girls Inc. In fact, in 2009 alone, Women’s Fund granted a total of $15,000 to Girls Inc. of Greater Indianapolis, Girls Inc. of Johnson Co. and Girls Inc. of Shelby Co. to support summer camp scholarships. I look forward to seeing how Women’s Fund dollars will be put toward helping Bailey be a stronger, smarter, bolder girl.

GO Family Philanthropy Day: The Power of Half

Last Saturday, about 60 people, including 16 families, gathered for 2010 GO Family Philanthropy Day at the Indianapolis Art Center. This event provided a meaningful and enriching philanthropy education experience to parents whose children are involved in GO: Give Back.

The day featured speaker Joan Salwen, whose husband, Kevin, and teenage daughter, Hannah, wrote the book The Power of Half. Joan shared first-hand her family's story of coming to the decision to sell their home, moving into a home half the size, and donating half the proceeds to a cause they mutually agreed upon as a family. See teenage son Joseph Salwen's YouTube video for a great synopsis of their story.

After hearing the Salwen's story, families were divided into age-specific groups to explore concepts shared in The Power of Half, such as: "What's your half?" (What can you give?), "Follow your heart," and "Use your voice." Parents engaged in a group discussion with Joan to explore the topic, while intermediate ages worked on a PSA video project to share their message, and elementary ages engaged in interactive art projects. Preschool-age children were also included in the day's events with their own special activities.

The day concluded with a family art project and picnic lunch. To further connect the concept of giving half, half the expense budgeted for the day's food and all of the expense budgeted for an event token was saved, to be used for philanthropic purposes. School-age children participating in the fall GO: Give Back educational session will undergo a group grantmaking exercise to decide where to donate the funds.

The buzz in the air was unmistakable, and the day was truly a success. Women's Fund thanks The Glick Fund of CICF for making Family Philanthropy Day possible, as well as the volunteers and Indianapolis Art Center staff who led dynamic programs.

If you are interested in learning more about philanthropy education for children through GO: Give Back, please contact us.